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Mad #316 Jan. 1993
- Cover Photographer: Irving Schild
- Cover Pumpkin Sculptor: Hugh McMahon
- Sister Axed (Movie Satire)
- The Differences Between the 80's and the 90's
- Greeting Cards That Keep Up With the Times
- Words of Warning That Your Life is Not Going Well
- Duck Edwing -- The Cretinous Cook's Concoction, The Wacky Washroom Whizbang, The Volatile Vegetable Vignette
- The Mad Living Will
- Instant TV Reviews
- Mad's Avalanche O' Catalogs
- Mix and Match TV Talk Show Guest & Topic Generator
- Sergio Aragones -- A Mad Look at Tattoos
- Mad Proverbs
- Customer Satisfaction Surveys
- Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade Rejects
- Commemorative Stamps We'll Never See
- Patr*idiotic Games (Movie Satire)
- Spy Vs. Spy
- Al Jaffee Fold-In -- With the demise of the Soviet Fleet, what appears to be our Navy hotshots' latest target?
- Back Cover -- Sasssy Magazine
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