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Mad #245 March 1984
- Cover Artist: Richard Williams
- Staying Awake (Movie Satire)
- What Parents Think...and...What Kids Think
- Don Martin -- One Lucky Morning on Friday the 13th, One Insane Afternoon on Interstate 80, One Ridiculous Evening in the Jungle
- Will You Make a Good Athlete?
- Paul Peter Porges -- We Won't Miss Them...Or Will We?!?
- What is a Hang-Up?
- Wishful Thinking
- Little Known Patents
- Helpful Hints on Breaking Up With a Girl
- Movie Theatre Owners Supply Catalogue
- Bill Johnson -- A Mad Look at Ants
- Not-So-New-Hart (TV Satire)
- Spy Vs. Spy
- Al Jaffee Fold-In -- What dreaded eruption will devastate millions in 1984?
- Back Cover -- Caveman Graffiti
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